My Big Why
I am passionate about helping women reclaim their Powerful Truth as a Spiritual AND Sexual Being, so they liberate ecstatic self-love, a deep sense of emotional wholeness and inner peace within their sexual body, and unapologetic empowered playful expression in relationships and purpose.
My big why and inspiration at the root of all this is to light the way to sexual enlightenment, verses sexual confusion for the daughters who follow.
My Catalyst Moment
“My catalyst moment in business happened because of a sign from the Universe. Not a metaphorical sign, but an actual billboard…
At age 16 I was naïve, needy and longing for a man to say “I love you” and to tell me what to do. My father didn’t know how, so I searched outside of the home. I was easy prey.
It’s November 1998. I’m 42 years old, standing in the subway station in Toronto, trying to grasp the sign in front of me. A billboard on the wall says, “TEENAGE PROSTITION IS CHILD ABUSE”.
I’m in shock, unable to breathe. Until that moment, I believed I was just a “bad” girl.
That child prostitute was me; a secret I kept buried for 27 years.
Thirty minutes later I’m home looking out my bathroom window and suddenly 27 years of suppressed emotions erupt out of me. Anger at the man who manipulated me with love so he could be my pimp. Grief at the loss of my adolescence as I was sold for dollars instead of dancing at my school prom. Rage at my junior high school principal, who I saw as a father role model, as I remember that day he found me sitting on a bar stool at age 16, and took me to a hotel you rent by the hour. The horrible truth of that moment penetrating my soul, remembering how I lay in bed with this 6’3” man, next to his wooden leg as he said, “I always thought you were sexy. Yes, this is a good profession for you.”
I feel like I’m going to I’d explode. The pain is unbearable. I cry out, “God, please help me!!!” In that moment, a bird lands on my patio railing, and like flicking a switch, I instantly feel peaceful.
You see, Spirit speaks to me through animals because they know I will look it up. That bird was a Grackle. The teaching of a Grackle is: to release emotional congestion from the past before it manifests into physical illness, so you can move forward into the future.
That message from Spirit was clear, so for two days, I stayed home and I purged. I cried. I screamed. I collapsed. I slept and I purged some more, knowing I was not alone, feeling held by the love of my Divine Nonphysical Team. At the end of those two days, a veil lifted, freeing me the weight of self-judgment and shame I had carried all those years.
The breakdown I had on that day of the Grackle transcended into the breakthrough that reclaimed my light, self-love and my Powerful Truth.
This planted the seed of my desire to help other women liberate themselves from the emotional residue of sexual wounding and reclaim their Powerful Truth. It was the beginning of my healing journey and Spiritual quest to integrate my relationship with God and my Sexual Expression.
It was my catalyst moment in business. Yes, I make it my business to be the Sensual Sage of Sexual Enlightenment, to guide others to transcend their pain to wisdom so they can breathe into peace, and be in ecstatic expression in love and purpose.
My Phoenix Move ~
How I Set My Fire Free
Here’s the story of My Phoenix Move… Rising from the Ashes…
Knowing that I wanted to create a business by helping women with sexual enlightenment was one thing; finding a way to communicate that sent me on a painful journey down the rabbit hole that almost made me want to give up.
The lowest point of my business was in the fall of 2012. I had just completed three years of intensive marketing training and coaching certification, which all started because I was burnt out from doing private healing in my home based studio, and had a passion to deliver my message through speaking.
I knew how to facilitate powerful healing. Through my background as an actor as a guest facilitator at one of T. Harv Eker’s summer processes since 2002, I knew how to hold space from the stage. What I needed was to learn how to coach, create coaching packages and an online presence so I could create a business around my message.
So I invested thousands and thousands of dollars in the best business coaches I could find. Most of them gave me great value. They taught me how to coach, create programs and packages and have an online presence, but they also kept trying to turn me into a business coach, because after all… that’s what they do… business coaching.
They didn’t know how to guide me with regard to helping others with their sexual energy. Often I was advised to not lead with sexuality, telling me that it would be intimidating, and to instead insert it as part of the process to help people with their business. I thought they’re the coaches with all the money. They must know what they’re talking about.
For over a year between 2011 and to the end of 2012, I rewrote the landing page on my website every single day. No matter what I wrote, it never felt right. I became obsessed with finding the right words to communicate my message. Every day I struggled to find the words and it never came out right.
I was a good marketing student, but it wasn’t working. It was painful and I had no clients and few following my message and those that did were confused. No wonder! So was I.
Frustrated and overwhelmed, I eventually took a step back stopped rewriting my website, and turned within. I stopped blaming my coaches, knowing this was my journey and clarity I had to find on my own.
Then after a period of pulling back, reclaiming my own inner alignment and knowing, at the beginning of 2014, I finally said to myself, “f*** it! I’ve tried everything else. I’m just going to talk about Sexuality, the way I like to talk about it. So, I posted on Facebook my first original Sexual Enlightenment quote over a mostly naked pic of myself at the age of 58.
I was not prepared for the response. Immediately after posting, women were messaging me, communicating how much they loved my new message. ( It wasn’t really new, I was just keeping it hidden) They couldn’t get enough. They were sharing my posts with others. Me and my message stepped out of the shadows and into the sunlight, exposed in a way that felt peaceful, joyful and aligned.
I STOPPED SAYING WHAT I THOUGHT I “SHOULD” SAY AND SPOKE FROM MY SOUL AND MY HEART. AND THEY LOVED IT.
I was ecstatic. My fears of being judged or of being too intimidating melted away. It was then that I fully owned who I am as a Spiritual Teacher and claimed my power around that. It was like the clouds parted and the sun came shining in.
There was still lots of work to do. My business did not suddenly shift with a pouring in of clients. It was more of a trickeling in. Now that I felt free to share the wisdom that was really in my heart, I dove into deep creation mode.
Everything I had created until then had to burn away. It was time to rise out of the ashes and fully set my fire free. I was inspired to write and create as much as I could. I was out of fees to pay an assistant, so I created all my banners and graphics, my webpages and did the video editing myself. This appeals to the artist in me, but it does move things along a little slower, than if you have a team to help out.
I felt on fire. I just wanted to create and create. I came up with the idea for my new book, “The Four Sacred Laws of Sexual Enlightenment”, which will launch this year.
Then the most amazing photographer saw my message and asked to take my new photos to support my message to reach more people. Her name is Evelina Pentcheva. She is now my co-creative partner. The photo on this post is one of the many she has shot of me. Together we created a deck of cards called the “Sacred Sexual Enlightenment Wisdom Cards”, which women consistently purchase online for their personal use and as a facilitation tool. www.SacredSexualEnlightenment.com
In the fall of 2015, I realized I had been in creation mode for so long, and although what I created was beautiful, it was time to actually work with the women.
Last November I attended Lisa Nichol’s Powerhouse Speaker’s event for the 2nd time. I adore that community. Jennifer Kem was there as one of the Speakers, and the coaching she gave to another woman from the stage, I knew was meant for me.
This woman had been out of touch with her list… just like me. She wanted to offer a program to them… just like me. Jenn told her to offer it for free, even thought its value may be $500. She shared that because she’s been out of touch, to not ask them to pay, but to gift it. I felt the power of this.
I took Jenn’s advice. By the end of February I launched a new online program for women, called “S.A.C.R.E.D. Sexual Priestess – Online 6-Part Journey to Liberate Ecstatic Love, Emotional Wholeness and Empowered Expression. 270 women registered.
It was a great success. I already have requests by women to be certified in to teach this program themselves. They were blown away, some of them watching the replays as many as 3 or 4 times to make sure they got every nugget.
They healed emotions from past sexual wounding that they had carried for years. They restored the intimacy in their relationships that had been lost through disconnect. They reclaimed who they are as both a Spiritual AND Sexual Being and found their voice. They are women from various backgrounds, aging from the 20’s to late 60’s. Our secret FB group is still going strong and I am offering the program again starting April 27th. www.SexualPriestess.com
I am also birthing a coaching program that I have wanted to create since I heard about the death of Whitney Houston. I remember thinking, “if I could have spent a couple months with her, she’d still be here and the sadness that was her undoing would be transcended into inner peace and joy”.
This new program is for Women of film and TV. I love the the film business and speak the language. Through this program, they will feel grounded, focused, calm and connected in their sexual energy before, during and after the shot
I rose out of the fire and now I’m on fire.
Together myself and my clients are rising up, creating a paradigm shift.
The world needs this. The daughters who follow are counting on us. Their emotional well being depends on us. We are all responsible. It’s time to take the conversation out of the shadows and into the light.
Through sexual suppression, shame and exploitation we hold ourselves back. Sexual Energy is our Creative Force. It’s part of our Divine Design.
It’s time for a shift in Sexual Consciousness.
It’s time for Sexual Enlightenment and I am honored to be a guide on this journey.